birdbath | What Rhymes with Stanza?

After multiple seasons of chipping my lawnmower blade on a chunk of concrete protruding from the grass at the very edge of my property, I decided one day to dig the offending obstruction out of the ground.

I grabbed a shovel and set to it. The more I dug, however, the more I found. Ultimately, I discovered I had come upon the burial site of a heavy concrete birdbath — pedestal and all – chunked into several pieces. Kind of like a victim in a creepy ax murder movie, only with cement dust instead of blood. More than I had bargained for, at any rate.

I loaded the pieces into my wheelbarrow and dumped them next to my driveway until I could figure out a way to get rid of the body – er, I mean birdbath. After a few months of staring at the rubble, I came up with a plan. I would hide the body in plain sight!

I had dug up a circular section of turf in the middle of my yard several months previously, admittedly with no clue as to how I was going to incorporate it into my landscape theme (or lack thereof). Keep the neighbors guessing, I always say.

So here I had this garden-like circular space and these rock-like concrete chunks. What better way to kill two birds with one birdbath, than to combine the garden and the rocks to build a rock garden!

Of course, I don’t really know how to make a rock garden, but I lined the circle area with the concrete chunks, and then planted a shrub in the middle for good measure. Maybe shrubs don’t belong in rock gardens, and maybe the rock garden will morph into something else over time. Apparently it’s not just the neighbors whom I confound with my actions; I have no clue either as to what I’m doing.

I think I’ve pulled off disguising the birdbath corpse, though. At least there haven’t been any robins or sparrows in long black overcoats and fedora hats pulled low over their eyes knocking at my door.

I wonder what else I will uncover as I continue my random landscape projects. I’m thinking of tearing down the old shed behind my house… what do you suppose lies hidden beneath that?

The Daily Post weekly photo challenge: Repurpose

Letter One

Dear birds who
frequent my front yard:

A voice whispered in my ear,
“Buy it and they will come.”
I was confused, and said, “Buy what?”
The voice said, “Cheep!”
So I went to the store and looked for something cheap.
I found a colorful glass birdbath
on a wrought iron base.
It was on sale.
I bought it.

I set it up in the front yard,
filled it with water,
added three big rocks (for ambiance),
… and waited…

No one came.

Okay… one bird came.
An avian bath critic, perhaps,
who apparently voted
two wings down.

Perhaps I should have splurged
on the Jacuzzi model, or maybe
the optional water slide.
But I did not.
After all, the voice did say cheap.

Henceforth, little birds,
If you aren’t going to utilize
the colorful glass birdbath
on the wrought iron base,
please stay downwind from me.
There are few things worse
than an unbathed bird.

And please,
stop whispering in my ear.

Sincerely,
Birdbath Owner

= 0 = 0 = 0 =

Letter Two

Dear dog who sits at the bathroom door
every time I pee:

You’ve taught me a lot
since you came to live with me.
Like not to leave socks lying around.
Or pens. Or slippers.
Or granola in a bowl of milk.

I’ve tried to teach you things, too.
Like barking to alert me
of your need to go outside.
Like NOT barking to alert me
every time the neighbors walk by.
And that it’s bad form to drink from the toilet
or to try to hump the cat.

I’ve seen you staring out the window
at the colorful glass birdbath
on the wrought iron base.
Could that have something to do
with its unpopularity?

Please don’t chase the birds.
I am fairly certain they do not want
to play with you.

Cordially,
Alpha Pack Leader

= 0 = 0 = 0 =

Letter Three

Dear Cat who
shares my domicile:

There’s a new water dish
in the front yard for you.
It’s made of colorful glass
on a wrought iron base.
We can remove the three big rocks
if you don’t like the ambiance.

I’m really sorry about the dog thing.
What can I say… he likes you.

Faithfully,
Filler of the Water Dish

= 0 = 0 = 0 =

What Rhymes with Stanza?

Words at rest, words at play

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Body Dump